...you are burnt out, tired of the mental tug-of-war between all of the "shoulds" in your mind (and the unsolicited advice from family and friends).
You don't even know anyone who has breastfed for this long and your parenting style is different from how you were raised so how are you supposed to suddenly become a mind reader - and all the distractions and redirections in the world don't seem to stop your little one from pulling on your shirt the second you sit down.
But it has not always been easy.
..actually, far from it.
After overcoming newborn breastfeeding difficulties with my oldest (she didn't latch at all for 3 days, tongue and lip tie revisions, reflux, colic etc...) I thought I knew it all.
By the time she was 18 months, I was actively supporting other moms to breastfeed and dreaming about what the future would hold.
And then I got pregnant.
The aversions began, the epic meltdowns when I would say "no" to a breastfeed (that would last for *hours*), not being able to leave her with my husband for even a minute without a tantrum... and the worst part was the internal chaos I felt trying to find my footing and a pathway forward.
But, my passion for learning and creating emotional wellbeing in my home kept me looking for answers.
Place one hand on your heart, and the other on your belly.
Inhale a big, deep breath in through your nose, feel your hand rise with your belly and the cool air coming in through your nostrils.
Exhale out nice and slow and feel your belly fall.
Consider right now what level your emotional pain is. How badly does your heart hurt when you think about the future of your breastfeeding relationship with your kiddo?
Out of 10, what would you say it is?
How long can you keep on with that pain inside of you? How is that stress weighing on and straining your relationship everyday?
Even if you eliminated breastfeeding completely right now, would the feelings of inadequacy and worry disappear too? Or would they just find a new place to pop up?
Notice your breath again, mama.
Deeeeeep breath in.... and a nice sloooow breath out.